I am a different person than I was last year. I have not only grown, I have changed: I am a mother. And I embrace that identity. I thrive in it. I dance around the room in it, the pure deliciousness that is loving my TA.
And that has been the entire 10 months between December 15 and October 6. Oh, sure, other things have happened: I finished my masters degree, finished my teacher certification, lost my job, spent glorious months at home with my darling daughter and have spent grueling hours searching for a new job. But really? When I think of where I am right this very second, it is this: I am a mother. And that is the bestest place to be.
In the next year, we will move to a bigger home. We will wait for TA to become a sister. I will hopefully find a job (CROSS YOUR FINGERS). I know and hope these will come to pass, but you know what? I am a bit stuck right now. I think that is why I haven’t been blogging: I’m stuck.
And it is a Good Stuck this time. I am doing what I can to move my family forward, but honestly? I am so Happy now, so very very Happy, that I wish I could hold on to this moment forever, just never let it get away. Romantic, yes, but just a wee teensie impractical. And also, I’m boring. I’m boring in my stuckedness. I have no motivation, no angst, the sky is not falling, hell, I don’t even have any snark left in me.
I’m just Happy, so much so that it’s like Pollyanna is my other personality. Unemployed? That is GREAT. I get to enjoy the lovely weather with TA. I have to move? AWESOME, I get to look for a place with a sunroom. See? I can’t seem to accept the downside to either, let alone be bogged down by them. The flu? Well, at least it only lasted for one full day, and WOOT TA didn’t get it. (And yes, I annoy even myself with this, at times.)
So that’s been my past ten months in a nutshell, living in a lovebubble. And let me tell you, the sun shines a lot brighter from in here.
A job would make it perfect, though. Just sayin.